This is a work of fanfiction by Butterfree/Dragonfree/antialiasis and is not to be reposted without permission. This story is in no way official or endorsed by Nintendo, GAME FREAK, Creatures Inc., or The Pokémon Company.

The Forum

Pocus the Abra had always wanted to found a forum, so he did.

In his mind, he had a clear Image of a Perfect Community. It would have friendly members who would post meaningful contributions to all topics, they would never ask to be mods, and they would act mature at all times. So he founded the forum, and a few people joined, and all was well. After getting a certain number of members, he evolved into a Kadabra, because somehow members came instead of experience points. Don’t ask me how that happened.

Anyway, then Pocus was really happy, because he had lots of members and was now a Kadabra. But slowly he realized that everybody else had completely different Images of a Perfect Community, and they flamed and they spammed and they asked to be mods and they were immature. So Pocus made Rules, which were basically a simple list of guidelines that, if followed, would bring the forum closer to his ideal Image of a Perfect Community. And he made the Rules, and almost everybody followed them, and he stabbed the ones who didn’t with a spoon, and all was well.

And then he got more members, and he evolved into an Alakazam! I don't know how, because Kadabra doesn't even evolve with experience points, but who cares. Now he was much more powerful and intelligent than everybody else, so he was very happy. One day he realized that he had forgotten what his Image of a Perfect Community was like. So he looked at his Rules again, memorized them by heart because he had an IQ of 5000 and could do that sort of thing, and started enforcing them. The bad part was that even though his Image of a Perfect Community was perfect, the Rules weren’t and could have used some editing, because according to the Rules, a bunch of things weren’t allowed that really weren’t against the Image of a Perfect Community itself. But he was much more powerful and intelligent than everybody else, so it didn’t matter, and he stabbed everybody who did something against the Rules with a spoon, even if they didn’t actually do anything against his original Image of a Perfect Community, because he really didn’t care about that anymore, and all was well.

Then the members started to realize that things weren’t quite as they should be, and in fact the forum didn’t really match anybody’s Image of a Perfect Community, but they thought, ‘Oh, he is much more powerful and intelligent than us, and besides, he has spoons to stab people with, so he’s always right.’ And then people started to get fed up and left, but Pocus didn’t care because he was an Alakazam and was having fun stabbing people with a spoon, and he lived happily ever after.


Page last modified July 14 2017 at 16:44 GMT